Home is Happiness!

I went home for the wonderful week of Thanksgiving! Sometimes I almost forget how funny and fabulous my family is...they said so many awesome things and I only wrote down a tiny bit.

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Bethy: You should hear my schedule for next semester...
Mom: Oh Gawd.
Bethy: Feminism in science.
Mom: Nice.
Bethy: Sex, Body, and Reproduction.
Mom: You'll LOVE that one.

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Bethy: Yeah....mom and I just have that kind of relationship.

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Mom: I could work here.
Bethy: I could do a better job than you....I'd be dippy, but at least I'd be pleasant.
Mom: You'd be drunk.

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Bethy: I've never used a beer bong.
Mom: You just hang in there, Bethy.

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(the weather was WILD)
CJ: It's because of El Nino
Amy: you made that up.
CJ: No. Really...El Nino.
Mom: It's real. It's impacting Alaska. All of that territory is melting.
Bethy: Alright! Does that mean that we will be bigger than them?!
Amy: Like a true Texan.

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Mom: If I could live on the Mississippi River, I would...something about that river enchants me.

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(Heidi Linder was Bethy and CJ's voice teacher)
Mom: I'm going to sue Heidi Linder. I'm still trying to figure out who the fuck I can sue for Amy's voice.
Bethy: Sue yourself.
CJ: Yeah. Blame your genes...you know, as bad as my voice is, it's not NEARLY as bad as Amy's

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Mom: Amy has a bunch of friends coming over.
Bethy: Really?
Mom: Yeah. Jessa and her boyfriend, Natalie and her boyfriend...
Bethy: Woah! Where's your boyfriend Amy?! Fifth Wheel!!
Mom: Write it down, Ame.

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(Danger Zone is playing on the radio)
Mom: Look at all this traffic...they designed this so poorly...all these bad drivers! Talk about a danger zone.

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(leaving hair salon)
Mom: There was a lot of blue hair running around in there.

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Mom: Right now, you're just fat, happy, and carefree.

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Amy: Woah. Your pants won't even button.
Bethy: Yeah - I know...I'm big...but I still get more play than anybody else in this house.

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Bethy: Mom does so much absurd stuff...but no one ever believes it...like when she chased me with that chair today.
CJ: You know what Matilda says about the Trunchbull: "never do anything by halves...do it by wholes...then you get away with it."
Bethy: Yeah. Mom has that tatooed on her somewhere.